For those of you just tuning in, I was having a little trouble with my plumbing last weekend.
As far as the rusty bathwater is concerned, the problem seems to be under control after much patience and a shameful amount of water down the drain. It was literally painful for the tree-hugging, dirt-worshipping, nature-loving hippie in me to watch. I'm betting I single-handedly tripled the building's water bill this month.
The bathroom sink and I quickly came to an understanding, which was more or less, "You WILL drain, motherfucker, otherwise I will continue to pour caustic chemicals down your throat and attack you with a coat hanger." The bathroom sink got the message after a couple of hours and has been draining peacefully ever since.
The kitchen sink was a bit more obstinate.
As I mentioned, the drain was completely stopped, so when I poured the super-duper psycho industrial-strength drain opener in, all it did was collect in the sink basin, filling the sink with a noxious, greenish-colored liquid, which stayed there for three days. The first two days I stomped around all pissed off, constantly checking to see if it had moved at all and wondering what my next course of action would be, because at this point I didn't want to involve the building maintenance guy, figuring he would probably tell me that I'm not supposed to pour chemicals like that down their pipes. By the third day I had sort of forgotten about it, and I was surprised to glance in the sink that evening and see it empty. So I poured the rest of the super-duper psycho drain opener in, waited two hours, and flushed it with hot water. I haven't used it much, so far it's been draining obediently, but I still don't trust it.
*author's note* FORGET WHAT I JUST SAID. In the name of honesty and accurate storytelling, I just went to go verify that what I told you was true and the sink really was still draining. I looked down the drain and all seemed clear, so I opened the faucet and let it run for a few minutes... AND THE BITCH FILLED UP WITH WATER. It's not draining. Or maybe it is. If it is, it's draining so slowly I'll be able to pack up and move out by the time it's finished. To an apartment that has a functioning kitchen sink.