Tuesday, March 30, 2010
It looks like I'm about to be one.
Well, not really. I'll always be a New Orleans girl. We all know that. She's my love, my life, my everything. My heart and soul live there, and always will. I can't stay away. I'm not even gone yet, and my heart is already aching for her. Just the thought of leaving, it makes me cry. But I'll be back. At the end of the day, I'll always come home. She's my destiny.
But right now, it seems like life is taking me to Manhattan for a while. I have an opportunity, and something is pulling me. I feel compelled to follow. Feels like I'm on the edge of a cliff right now.
Shit. Shit shit shit. I never wanted this! New York was never in my plans, never on the list. I grew up in her shadow, on Long Island. Had no interest in the city. Moved to New Orleans in 1996 and never looked back. Now I'm being catapulted back. My head is spinning.
My life is about to be in upheaval again. Moving, packing, saying goodbye to a place I love, tearing myself away from friends, family and loved ones. Didn't I just do all that two months ago?
Leaving San Francisco was hard. Leaving New Orleans will be harder. To be honest, I might not be able to. It would be so easy to stay. I have everything I need. Great food and music. All the love I can stand. A beautiful home and pool weather nine months out of the year. Sexy jazz musicians to date...
Scheming and dreaming. Need to sleep on it tonight...